Dexter Is Still Sexy

I am way, way, way behind on this show. It is great. If anyone leaves a comment telling me anything that happens halfway after season two, I’ll make like Dex and chop you up (just kidding, that’s creepy and I’m a little squeamish).

But I have a problem, and the problem is that I can’t watch it without wanting to fuck Dexter. Not Michael C. Hall. Michael C. Hall has been divorced twice and seems a little slutty. Dexter, on the other hand, is a delicious sexy monster man with emotional issues and seriously jacked arms (well, I guess Mikey Hall has those too, but moving on).

And I’m sorry, but the scene in season one where he goes to the therapist and uncovers some cray-cray emotional flashbacks and then goes over to his girlfriend’s house and gets it in? Hottest. Thing. Ever.

See, I hate blonde men, and I really hate gingers, and Michael C. Hall is a mix of both. And he has blue eyes, I think, and despite the Cro-Magnon brow he has a tiny bit of a pretty-boy face. None of these things are my thing; in fact, they are the opposite of “my thing.” But something about Dexter makes me want to do omhfdngfjnjksgnd ridiculous things. He just has some kind of magic sexual sparkle dust that he, like, throws into my eyes from the TV screen. I mean, I’ve written a post about how hot he is before, but lately I am just overcome with lust watching that show.

I think it’s just animal magnetism. Like with Kayne West or Eric Dane or the guy who plays Thor–none of those guys are my scruffy, scrumptious type, but they just have that something sexy. And, well, yup, that’s pretty much my whole point with this post: I THINK CELEBRITIES ARE HOT AND I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH THEM. There, that would’ve summed things up. But then you never would’ve seen that shirtless photo of Dexter, and I couldn’t deprive anyone of that pleasure.

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