Let’s All Just Marry Makeup Brush Sets

I have an obsession, and that obsession is makeup. I watch makeup tutorials on YouTube for fun, I just bought a set of nice brushes and was practically drooling when I took them out of the package, and there is nothing I love more than being asked for how-the-fuck-do-I-make-myself-pretty advice.

I guess there are worse things to be obsessed with. Like someone’s family (I’m looking at you, Robbin Williams as the creeper of One Hour Photo) or heroin. And I am not one of those girls who shaves off their eyebrows and draws them on, or fake-bakes, or wears three inches of panstick. I just like doing makeup, of every style and shade and look you can possibly dream of. If I had a webcam that didn’t have the resolution of a sonogram, I would probably do my own tutorials.

But, alas, I only have my ancient webby, so instead I just do all my friends’ makeup when they go out. And I don’t mean to toot my own horn, but I’m pretty stellar at it. I did my friend’s makeup for her wedding, and trust, nobody’s going to ask you to do their wedding makeup if you turn people into Bozo the Clown every time you pick up a mascara wand.

I’m not really sure what the point of this post is, other than to tell people I love makeup. And to ask any makeup questions you have, Internet World, I suppose? (Nothing makes me want to cry more than when people write in to Yahoo! Answers with cosmetics questions and then get the absolute worst responses. All day, I imagine them taking some fool’s advice and wandering around with chalk-white eyeshadow and blotches of purple rouge on their cheeks.) And as an excuse to say how much I love my new brush set, because I LOVE MY NEW BRUSH SET.

Did I mention I love my new brush set?